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Graduation Speech Jokes for Speakers without a Degree

Posted on August 14, 2014August 30, 2019 by Matthias Müller-Krey
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In today’s world, a college degree is no longer mandatory for those who want to become rich and famous. As a result, a college degree is no longer mandatory for those who want to deliver a speech at a college graduation ceremony.

Neil Gaiman for example, became a famous writer without ever going to university. Yet, he was invited to speak to the graduates at Philadelphia Art School in 2012. Comedian Conan O’Brien also never graduated and was invited to speak at the University of Dartmouth in 2011. And in 2017, Harvard dropout Mark Zuckerberg delivered his graduation speech at – where else – Harvard.

Graduation speakers with no degree, no one finds this odd any more – except for the graduates maybe, because a graduation speaker with no degree confronts them with the fact, that the years spend in lecture halls and libraries might not have been the best use of their time.

Graduation Speech

Therefore, most graduation speakers with no degree reveal this sensitive piece of information in combination with a little joke. Bill Gates for example, said this in his speech at Harvard in 2007: “I don’t have a degree and even got Steve Ballmer to drop out of business school. I’m a bad influence. That’s why I was invited to speak at your graduation. If I had spoken at your orientation, fewer of you might be here today.”

Steve Jobs said in his 2005 graduation speech at Stanford University: “I never graduated from university. As a matter of fact, I never came closer to a university degree than today.”

Andy Samberg said in his speech in Harvard in 2012:“I’m also just over the moon to be receiving an honorary degree here today, I mean never in my wildest dreams did I [stops and turns his head to the side] – what’s that? No degree? So what, I’m just like, just like a professor or… Oh nothing? Well, then why am I here? Dean Hammonds. You lied to me!”

Are you looking for more funny things to say? Here you find a large collection of hilarious lines for graduation speeches.

 

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